Transitions

I got lots of them.

Anyone need any extra?

This past week it´s all finally sinking in that I am leaving Mexico in a week- after being here just enough time to start to feel some sort of a rhythm. I am leaving for Atlanta to live for two months before flying back to Idaho to fly back to Tennessee to start school in the fall. Poop- that sentence was a series of transitions.

Of course I have created all of this myself- which is the hilarious and somewhat perplexing part of it all. These are the questions I have been chewing on (when I am not still chewing on the really chewy cheese down here)-

1. Why would I choose this?

2. How did all of this come together?

3. How come I´m still chewing on the piece of cheese that was on my tostada from saturday?

It´s sad-but these are things I think about. I know.


And I think I have one answer (at least to the first two questions, the will forever remain a mystery) for these questions- because I know I´m getting ready to be settled in one place doing one thing for 4 years. Maybe that´s oversimplifying. Maybe I really just am a poor planner and wait to the last second to do things and then try to cram in as much as possible so as to not feel like a total moron for having procrastinated completely. Ok, maybe there are more layers to my answer. But I think it´s mostly true.

You know when dogs get ready to sleep for the night? They do that seemingly pointless, circular dance around one small space before plopping down to sleep. That´s me right now. All this traveling around is the equivalent of a dog´s sleep ritual. Alright, I realize this analogy is probelmatic on a lot of levels. But I am so a dog person- and the image is sweet. Don´t poop in my proverbial water dish.

Anyhow- it´s Monday the 25th of May here- and I´m reminded that the next loop of my dog dance is rapidly approaching. I am planning on leaving exactly a week from today. Sunday is the finale for the Mexican Premier League and I want to make sure to watch it with my local futbol amigos down here. Saturday I plan on finally getting out an seeing the ruins of Monte Alban. Friday is my last day of class. Thursday is my birthday (which could functionally mean that Thursday is my last day of class). So it´s down to the days! And honestly, I´m excited.

Transitions are strange, paradoxical things. Having change keeps things fresh- changes in the weather, an upcoming trip, an unexpected guest. But having to much going on at once is confusing, frustrating, and exhausting. I think I have- for these weird and awkward last few years- as a way to distract myself from the fact that I have had no idea what the hell I was doing or who I was.

To return to my somewhat troublesome, but still totally cute dog analogy- I´ve finally committed myself to my sleep spot (I really hope my advisor isn´t somehow reading these) and I´m just doing my necessary little pre-sleep ritual.

Speaking of sleep...