Car Talk and Coming of Age

I am taking one large step toward some semblance of adulthood- I am becoming a car owner. I haven't even signed the title nor driven the car more than a couple of miles here in Moscow, but here I am already stressed out and writing in my blog at 1:25 am. There's a lot of details to have to think about when you own a car. I'm not that great with details.

I want to be careful not to give the impression that I am somehow ungrateful for the privelege of car ownership (in reality, "my" car is a gift from my mother, her old car). I am excited at the prospect of being able to steal away to the Smokies, drive through the Blue Ridge Mountains in North Carolina, not to mention at least one trip down to New Orleans (I'm pretty sure it's only like 9 hours). Anyhow, I guess I have lived such a seemingly simple, but ultimately somewhat responsibility-avoiding life. That is, part of my riding a bike and relying on the bus for this long has been largely motivated by financial and responsibility-related reasoning (i.e. avoiding) and 20 percent environmental and health thinking (i.e. just enough to make me feel like I'm doing a good thing and really justify the avoidance). Avoidance of responsibility and commitment continues to be a theme for me.

Most things that "normal" kids do when they are 18 (i.e. date girls and buy cars- not necessarily in that order), I am finally getting around to as a near 30 year-old. I guess I have always been a late bloomer (literally), so why would this be any different. There's just this part of me that gets so annoyed that I have allowed myself to avoid responsibility and commitment and not just simply face the realities of adulthood. Part of me feels so relieved to finally be participating in what, though perhaps somewhat sadly, has become a rite of passage in our culture. And like I said, though I do still have a part of me (which on a long-term use level is much higher than 20 percent of my thinking) that believes both in keeping one's life simple (not to mention minimizing one's impact on our Mother), there's part of me that really connects with the American sense of discovery and exploration that is inextricably linked to car travel. I think of all the beautiful places that I now have access to that I may never again have the chance to explore (if you couldn't tell by all of my gushy facebook posts and increase in blogging that I will be moving back out west when I'm done with grad school then now let it be known that I plan to be living out here in the wild(er) west). In fact, I got a list of natural wonders and beauty spots (as granny would call them) from a guy here in Moscow to go and check out while living in East Tennessee.

Like I said, I am grateful to my mother for my new vessel of exploration. For our grand Mother's sake, I wish this vessel was carbon-emission free (and that someday soon I'll live in a world and in an income bracket allowing for the purchase of such a vehicle), but as Edward Abbey used to say, the wild spirit of exploration and discovery calls us to get out and enjoy what natural beauty remains for as long as it remains. But it's not like I'm driving an SUV; it's a freaking Toyota Echo.

One small step for most. One giant leap for shitball, responsibility-avoiders everywhere. After all, real discovery can only come from exploring the roads of life. And the way I figure it, I hope to do as much exploring as I possibly can. Open road here I come.