I've Had Enough...

...of this freedom of the road.

I know it's lame to steal song titles and use them for my posting usage. But I'm not feeling funny nor creative so there.

I am back in my familiar spot at the little countertop in the kitchen at 489 Paradise Dr. with my headphones on, Grandpa next to me in the kitchen putting away this morning's groceries (he's pumped to make reuben sandwiches from the corned beef I cooked yesterday), and Granny listening to NPR and looking through her favorite pictures of the family (which is ALL of them). 

Much has changed and continues to, and yet nothing at all. And as I get nearer and nearer to making the next big decision and prepare to leave this place, I am so appreciative of the foundation of love, support, and regularity that Grandpa and Grandpa have provided over the years. I've been trying to think of a way to show my gratitude and let them know this. I've enjoyed cooking for them and I think I'll probably cook some of their favorite food and put down in words what it is I want to say to them. I want to make sure that when I leave here, that I've said all I need to say to both of them. They have been so good to me during this tumultuous time- patient, kind, and direct when necessary (and as direct as either of them are capable of). I hope someday to be able to provide this kind of space and time to my family.

I think I have come to appreciate both Mary Nell and Gordon as people better during this time. I know them as my Grandparents. I know them as a couple who has been married twice as long as I've been alive. And I know them as individual people. And on all of those levels, I feel like I've simply had the time with them to more fully appreciate the whole of who they are. How can one fully grasp the breadth and depth of a human's life? Of a couples' marriage? Of a grandparent's legacy? 

I'm chewing on all of this and savoring the flavor while it lasts.